SLanePorter - S. Lane Porter

For some, 'abnormal' is an insignificant facial tic. For others, it's a full blown attack of paranoia. In Abby's case, however, it's all relative.

As the daughter of a mental patient, Abby believes it is only a matter of time before she steps into her mother's shoes. The persistent hallucination of an imaginary person foredooms a gray future for which she has neither map nor compass.

Abby does have one thing going for her though. She's going crazy in Hollywood. And in Tinseltown, that's a rite of passage.

-- This script is no longer available for download on Triggerstreet.com. Last status before deletion was: STATUS: 790 of 3,315 on 1/16/09.

Dear Lane,

We received almost 150 scripts and it was really tough to make the cut down to the twelve finalists. But I wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed reading your script Breathing Vincent. It's a delightful idea with really fun characters.

Keep up the good work,
Jack Gilbert for Art Within

Triggerstreet responses:

I truly enjoyed this! Your production notes say it's more of a drama than a comedy, but I really didn't think so. I thought it had some very funny moments and at the same time was very touching. I'm actually giving across the board excellents - which, believe me, I don't often do. I'm finding it hard to think of anything that might be of help to you so I must resort to nit picking notes. I already like Abby. Isn't it strange that with only 2 minutes into this, you've managed to bring her to life. Good job! I've already laughed-out-loud at the interaction between these two friends.

This is, by far, the best script I've read in a LONG time. The characters were endearing and you chose a great imaginary friend in Vincent. Who on earth could make you feel safer than the tall, handsome, quirky D'Onofrio? Both Abby and Edan were the sort of people I'd like to know. And, if I was a cooler girl, become them someday. My favorite scenes were when Vincent lurked in the sidelines, especially when he slept nearby (when Abby put her arm around him in her sleep). I think audiences will be charmed by this script.

Breathing Vincent is an interesting concept, which made for an interesting read. It's always a good sign that I like a screenplay when my only note written on any page is about a typo. I'm not sure what the real Vincent D'Onofrio would think of it, but I'd like to think that he'd find it fun. Characters - Clear and concise. No misunderstanding where anyone's coming from. Story & Structure - simple and works well. It's not a convoluted sp. It builds up the tension piece by piece until Abby and the real Vincent meet up for mutual salvation. My only question regarding story would be the "Grease"-like ending. Perhaps it's a comment that "sanity" isn't really what sane is, especially in Hollywood?

Hats off for quite an imaginative piece of work! I found it difficult to buy the premise at first, but let myself be taken in by Abby's struggle for sanity in a dissolving universe. D'onofrio was a great choice, though I thought that perhaps Abby herself could contact him as a way of bringing him into the script as opposed to Edan meeting him on a movie set. Lots of great humorous parts with her mother and Dr. Ning.

Breathing Vincent is a very original screenplay. Everything from the story to the jokes in it breath their own life and do not share anything with anything. The screenplay is also a great satire that hits Hollywood. It is extremely funny and even funnier when the celebrities are introduced in it. The screenplay was nicely written. The amazing adjectives used made it easier to understand what was happening. Breathing Vincent also moved so quickly and flowed so wonderfully it never got old or boring. It kept moving along and continued to become more and more interesting.

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