Mercury Free Mock Tuna Salad

2011.01.09 | Random

Not my usual offering, but how this recipe relates to screenwriting is that it is food for my brain. One that sustains hunger and allows me to write more.  It’s also really CHEAP food.

A lot of people, especially pregnant women try to stay away from certain seafoods during pregnancy because of cumulative mercury levels, look for lunch alternatives. This is a great salad when cravings hit you. I am a vegetarian so finding great salads to stuff between pita pockets or bolillo rolls is always a dicey proposition. I like to stay as close to the original recipe as possible and this is how I created a tuna salad using chickpeas instead of tuna.

Why chickpeas? Easy. They smell a bit fishy (especially canned ones) and their texture is firm enough to resist becoming pasty after processing.

mock tuna salad


1 can of chickpeas
2 TBS of mayonaise (or Veganaise) or alternately 1 TBS Mayo and 1 TBS water
1 TBS prepared mustard (I like dark mustard)
2 TBS  sweet or dill pickle relish
1/4 cup chopped onion
1 stalk celery minced or chopped
pepper to taste

Step 1: Lay chickpeas out on a plate such that they are not overlapping. Using a fork, crush every chickpea. Don’t grind them into a paste, just crush them all up. Scoop all chickpeas into a bowl.

Step 2: Add all other ingredients but pepper until blended.

Step 3: Sprinkle black pepper into the bowl and taste until it has the amount you want. I love black pepper in this salad so I probably add much more than regular folks.

Finishing touches: Serve mock tuna salad on a bolillo roll that has been cross cut and toasted, or stuff into a pita with lettuce and tomato.  I find this salad is at its most savory when served on something toasted or crackers. It is wetter than tuna salad and can make a sandwich squishy if the bread hasn’t been toasted.

I’ve added all the calories up of all the ingredients (using regular mayo and sweet relish) and the amount comes to 605 calories. It can be divided up into 4 servings (for sandwiches) @ around 150 cal each. You can knock off even more calories by using light mayo or a bit of water as a binder.

Enjoy your mercury free, high protein, extremely tasty mock tuna salad!

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